MAID in the Netherlands, together

 The Guardian publishes a moving photo, and an interview with the photographer about his parents' decision to avail themselves of medical aid in dying, together.

My parents holding hands after their assisted deaths: Martin Roemers’ most personal photograph Interview by Charlotte Jansen   16 Apr 2025

 

 

"They had a good life and a very happy marriage, but the last years were difficult. They were both sick and exhausted. Both had heart failure, my mother had a lot of pain. Both were in a really bad shape. They still lived in their own house but life was getting harder and harder, even with help. They did not want to go to a nursing home and neither wanted to live without the other – they wanted to step out of life together. They were afraid one would die naturally and the other would be left behind. They were very close, and did everything together, really everything – so it made sense they would leave this life together

 

"In the Netherlands, where assisted dying is legal, this is possible if you have a very good reason. My mother always said: ”We will stay with you as long as we can, until we can see no other way out.” Physicians have to be convinced that the patient is suffering unbearably and has no chance of recovery. My parents were independently evaluated by different doctors, and it was granted to both of them.

 

"It’s a very long process but once the decision was made, it all happened very fast. They picked a date, and it was a week later – much sooner than I had thought. My father wanted to go out to dinner somewhere, and on the last evening before they would die, we were able to do that. My father was a very optimistic and worry-free person who would always laugh at our jokes, until the end. He was visibly enjoying his dinner that evening – that was good".